Personality Disorder

Having a personality disorder doesn’t mean that your personality is somehow flawed or there is something fundamentally wrong with who you are. Rather, someone with a personality disorder has rigid patterns of thought and behavior which makes it difficult to relate to people and situations. This has a negative effect on interpersonal relationships. Most people with a personality disorder are unable to sustain meaningful and fulfilling relationships at home or at work, and experience other problems functioning in social and occupational situations.

But you’re not powerless. Personality disorders are one of the most commonly diagnosed psychiatric conditions. There are effective treatments and coping skills that can help you feel be
tter, take back control of your thoughts, feelings, and actions, and build fulfilling relationships.

By understanding personality disorders, you can identify the best ways to regain control and lead a full and meaningful life.

What is a personality disorder?

A personality disorder is a condition that creates an unhealthy pattern of thinking, feeling, and behaving. Most people with a personality disorder experience chronic instability, especially in their relationships, moods, and behavior. You may feel like you’re unable to relate to the world around you or that your thoughts and impulses are out of control.

Since your way of thinking and behaving seems natural to you, you may not even realize that you have a problem. Instead, you may blame others for the difficulties you face, which can cause even more problems in your interpersonal relationships. With the right treatment and coping skills, though, you can regain control of your life.

Phobias and Fears

There are four general types of phobias and fears:

Animal phobias. Examples include fear of snakes, fear of spiders, fear of rodents, and fear of dogs.
Natural environment phobias. Examples include fear of heights, fear of storms, fear of water, and fear of the dark.
Situational phobias ( fears triggered by a specific situation). Examples include fear of enclosed spaces (claustrophobia), fear of flying, fear of driving, fear of tunnels, and fear of bridges.
Blood-Injection-Injury phobia. The fear of blood, fear or injury, or a fear of needles or other medical procedures.

Common phobias and fears
Fear of spiders
Fear of snakes
Fear of heights
Fear or closed spaces
Fear of storms
Fear of needles and injections
Fear of public speaking
Fear of flying
Fear of germs
Fear of illness or death
Some phobias don’t fall into one of the four common categories. Such phobias include fear of choking, fear of getting a disease such as cancer, and fear of clowns.

Social phobia and fear of public speaking

Social Phobia
Social phobia, also called social anxiety disorder, is fear of social situations where you may be embarrassed or judged. If you have social phobia you may be excessively self-conscious and afraid of humiliating yourself in front of others. Your anxiety over how you will look and what others will think may lead you to avoid certain social situations you’d otherwise enjoy.

Fear of public speaking, an extremely common phobia, is a type of social phobia. Other fears associated with social phobia include fear of eating or drinking in public, talking to strangers, taking exams, mingling at a party, and being called on in class.

Agoraphobia (fear of open spaces)

Agoraphobia
Agoraphobia is another phobia that doesn’t fit neatly into any of the four categories. Traditionally thought to involve a fear of public places and open spaces, it is now believed that agoraphobia develops as a complication of panic attacks.

Afraid of having another panic attack, you become anxious about being in situations where escape would be difficult or embarrassing, or where help wouldn't be immediately available. For example, you are likely to avoid crowded places such as shopping malls and movie theaters. You may also avoid cars, airplanes, subways, and other forms of travel. In more severe cases, you might only feel safe at home.

Signs and symptoms of phobias

The symptoms of a phobia can range from mild feelings of apprehension and anxiety to a full-blown panic attack. Typically, the closer you are to the thing you’re afraid of, the greater your fear will be. Your fear will also be higher if getting away is difficult.

Physical signs and symptoms of a phobia

Difficulty breathing
Racing or pounding heart
Chest pain or tightness
Trembling or shaking
Feeling dizzy or lightheaded
A churning stomach
Hot or cold flashes; tingling sensations
Sweating
Emotional signs and symptoms of a phobia

Feeling of overwhelming anxiety or panic
Feeling an intense need to escape
Feeling “unreal” or detached from yourself
Fear of losing control or going crazy
Feeling like you’re going to die or pass out
Knowing that you’re overreacting, but feeling powerless to control your fear
Symptoms of Blood-Injection-Injury Phobia
The symptoms of blood-injection-injury phobia are slightly different from other phobias. When confronted with the sight of blood or a needle, you experience not only fear but disgust.

Like other phobias, you initially feel anxious as your heart speeds up. However, unlike other phobias, this acceleration is followed by a quick drop in blood pressure, which leads to nausea, dizziness, and fainting. Although a fear of fainting is common in all specific phobias, blood-injection-injury phobia is the only phobia where fainting can actually occur.

When to seek help for phobias and fears

Although phobias are common, they don’t always cause considerable distress or significantly disrupt your life. For example, if you have a snake phobia, it may cause no problems in your everyday activities if you live in a city where you are not likely to run into one. On the other hand, if you have a severe phobia of crowded spaces, living in a big city would pose a problem.

If your phobia doesn’t really impact your life that much, it’s probably nothing to be concerned about. But if avoidance of the object, activity, or situation that triggers your phobia interferes with your normal functioning or keeps you from doing things you would otherwise enjoy, it’s time to seek help.

Consider treatment for your phobia if:

It causes intense and disabling fear, anxiety, and panic.
You recognize that your fear is excessive and unreasonable.
You avoid certain situations and places because of your phobia.
Your avoidance interferes with your normal routine or causes significant distress.
You’ve had the phobia for at least six months.
Self-help or therapy for phobias: which treatment is best?

When it comes to treating phobias, self-help strategies and therapy can both be effective. What’s best for you depends on a number of factors, including the severity of your phobia, your insurance coverage, and the amount of support you need.

As a general rule, self-help is always worth a try. The more you can do for yourself, the more in control you’ll feel—which goes a long way when it comes to phobias and fears. However, if your phobia is so severe that it triggers panic attacks or uncontrollable anxiety, you may want to get additional support.

The good news is that therapy for phobias has a great track record. Not only does it work extremely well, but you tend to see results very quickly—sometimes in as a little as 1-4 sessions.

However, support doesn’t have to come in the guise of a professional therapist. Just having someone to hold your hand or stand by your side as you face your fears can be extraordinarily helpful.

Phobia treatment tip 1: Face your fears, one step at a time

It’s only natural to want to avoid the thing or situation you fear. But when it comes to conquering phobias, facing your fears is the key. While avoidance may make you feel better in the short-term, it prevents you from learning that your phobia may not be as frightening or overwhelming as you think. You never get the chance to learn how to cope with your fears and experience control over the situation. As a result, the phobia becomes increasingly scarier and more daunting in your mind.

Exposure: Gradually and repeatedly facing your fears

The most effective way to overcome a phobia is by gradually and repeatedly exposing yourself to what you fear in a safe and controlled way. During this exposure process, you’ll learn to ride out the anxiety and fear until it inevitably passes.

Through repeated experiences facing your fear, you’ll begin to realize that the worst isn’t going to happen; you’re not going to die or “lose it”. With each exposure, you’ll feel more confident and in control. The phobia begins to lose its power.

Successfully facing your fears takes planning, practice, and patience. The following tips will help you get the most out of the exposure process.

Climbing up the “fear ladder”

If you’ve tried exposure in the past and it didn’t work, you may have started with something too scary or overwhelming. It’s important to begin with a situation that you can handle, and work your way up from there, building your confidence and coping skills as you move up the “fear ladder.”

Facing a fear of dogs: A sample fear ladder
Step 1: Look at pictures of dogs.
Step 2: Watch a video with dogs in it.
Step 3: Look at a dog through a window.
Step 4: Stand across the street from a dog on a leash.
Step 5: Stand 10 feet away from a dog on a leash.
Step 6: Stand 5 feet away from a dog on a leash.
Step 7: Stand beside a dog on a leash.
Step 8: Pet a small dog that someone is holding.
Step 9: Pet a larger dog on a leash.
Step 10: Pet a larger dog off leash.
Make a list. Make a list of the frightening situations related to your phobia. If you’re afraid of flying, your list (in addition to the obvious, such as taking a flight or getting through takeoff) might include booking your ticket, packing your suitcase, driving to the airport, watching planes take off and land, going through security, boarding the plane, and listening to the flight attendant present the safety instructions.
Build your fear ladder. Arrange the items on your list from the least scary to the most scary. The first step should make you slightly anxious, but not so frightened that you’re too intimidated to try it. When creating the ladder, it can be helpful to think about your end goal (for example, to be able to be near dogs without panicking) and then break down the steps needed to reach that goal.
Work your way up the ladder. Start with the first step (in this example, looking at pictures of dogs) and don’t move on until you start to feel more comfortable doing it. If at all possible, stay in the situation long enough for your anxiety to decrease. The longer you expose yourself to the thing you’re afraid of, the more you’ll get used to it and the less anxious you’ll feel when you face it the next time. If the situation itself is short (for example, crossing a bridge), do it over and over again until your anxiety starts to lessen. Once you’ve done a step on several separate occasions without feeling too much anxiety, you can move on to the next step. If a step is too hard, break it down into smaller steps or go slower.
Practice. It’s important to practice regularly. The more often you practice, the quicker your progress will be. However, don’t rush. Go at a pace that you can manage without feeling overwhelmed. And remember: you will feel uncomfortable and anxious as you face your fears, but the feelings are only temporary. If you stick with it, the anxiety will fade. Your fears won’t hurt you.
If you start to feel overwhelmed…

While it’s natural to feel scared or anxious as you face your phobia, you should never feel overwhelmed by these feelings. If you start to feel overwhelmed, immediately back off. You may need to spend more time learning to control feelings of anxiety (see the relaxation techniques below), or you may feel more comfortable working with a therapist.

Phobia treatment tip 2: Learn relaxation techniques

As you’ll recall, when you’re afraid or anxious, you experience a variety of uncomfortable physical symptoms, such as a racing heart and a suffocating feeling. These physical sensations can be frightening themselves—and a large part of what makes your phobia so distressing. However, by learning and practicing relaxation techniques, you can become more confident in your ability to tolerate these uncomfortable sensations and calm yourself down quickly.

Relaxation techniques such as deep breathing, meditation, and muscle relaxation are powerful antidotes to anxiety, panic, and fear. With regular practice, they can improve your ability to control the physical symptoms of anxiety, which will make facing your phobia less intimidating. Relaxation techniques will also help you cope more effectively with other sources of stress and anxiety in your life.

A simple deep breathing relaxation exercise

When you’re anxious, you tend to take quick, shallow breaths (also known as hyperventilating), which actually adds to the physical feelings of anxiety. By breathing deeply from the abdomen, you can reverse these physical sensations. You can’t be upset when you’re breathing slowly, deeply, and quietly. Within a few short minutes of deep breathing, you’ll feel less tense, short of breath, and anxious.

Sit or stand comfortably with your back straight.
Put one hand on your chest and the other on your stomach.
Take a slow breath in through your nose, counting to four. The hand on your stomach should rise. The hand on your chest should move very little.
Hold your breath for a count of seven.
Exhale through your mouth to a count of eight, pushing out as much air as you can while contracting your abdominal muscles. The hand on your stomach should move in as you exhale, but your other hand should move very little.
Inhale again, repeating the cycle until you feel relaxed and centered.
Try practicing this deep breathing technique for five minutes twice day. You don’t need to feel anxious to practice. In fact, it’s best to practice when you’re feeling calm until you’re familiar and comfortable with the exercise. Once you’re comfortable with this deep breathing technique, you can start to use it when you’re facing your phobia or in other stressful situations.

Phobia treatment tip 3: Challenge negative thoughts

Learning to challenge unhelpful thoughts is an important step in overcoming your phobia. When you have a phobia, you tend to overestimate how bad it will be if you’re exposed to the situation you fear. At the same time, you underestimate your ability to cope.

The anxious thoughts that trigger and fuel phobias are usually negative and unrealistic. It can help to put these thoughts to the test. Begin by writing down any negative thoughts you have when confronted with your phobia.

PHOBIA means

Almost everyone has an irrational fear or two—of mice, for example, or your annual dental checkup. For most people, these fears are minor. But, when fears become so severe that they cause tremendous anxiety and interfere with your normal life, they’re called phobias. The good news is that phobias can be managed and cured. Self-help strategies and therapy can help you overcome your fears and start living the life you want.

What is a phobia?

A phobia is an intense fear of something that, in reality, poses little or no actual danger. Common phobias and fears include closed-in places, heights, highway driving, flying insects, snakes, and needles. However, we can develop phobias of virtually anything. Most phobias develop in childhood, but they can also develop in adults.

If you have a phobia, you probably realize that your fear is unreasonable, yet you still can’t control your feelings. Just thinking about the feared object or situation may make you anxious. And when you’re actually exposed to the thing you fear, the terror is automatic and overwhelming.

The experience is so nerve-wracking that you may go to great lengths to avoid it — inconveniencing yourself or even changing your lifestyle. If you have claustrophobia, for example, you might turn down a lucrative job offer if you have to ride the elevator to get to the office. If you have a fear of heights, you might drive an extra twenty miles in order to avoid a tall bridge.

Understanding your phobia is the first step to overcoming it. It’s important to know that phobias are common. Having a phobia doesn’t mean you’re crazy! It also helps to know that phobias are highly treatable. You can overcome your anxiety and fear, no matter how out of control it feels.

Savitha’s fear of flying
Savitha is terrified of flying. Unfortunately, she has to travel a lot for work, and this traveling takes a terrible toll. For weeks before every trip, she has a knot in her stomach and a feeling of anxiety that won’t go away. On the day of the flight, she wakes up feeling like she’s going to throw up. Once she’s on the plane, her heart pounds, she feels lightheaded, and she starts to hyperventilate. Every time it gets worse and worse.

savitha’s fear of flying has gotten so bad that she finally told her boss she can only travel to places within driving distance. Her boss was not happy about this, and Savitha’s not sure what will happen at work. She’s afraid she’ll be demoted or lose her job altogether. But better that, she tells herself, than getting on a plane again.

“Normal” fear vs. phobias

It is normal and even helpful to experience fear in dangerous situations. Fear is an adaptive human response. It serves a protective purpose, activating the automatic “fight-or-flight” response. With our bodies and minds alert and ready for action, we are able to respo

nd quickly and protect ourselves.

But with phobias the threat is greatly exaggerated or nonexistent. For example, it is only natural to be afraid of a snarling Doberman, but it is irrational to be terrified of a friendly poodle on a leash, as you might be if you have a dog phobia.

Many childhood fears are natural and tend to develop at specific ages. For example, many young children are afraid of the dark and may need a nightlight to sleep. That doesn’t mean they have a phobia. In most cases, they will grow out of this fear as they get older.

If your child’s fear is not interfering with his or her daily life or causing him or her a great deal of distress, then there’s little cause for undue concern. However, if the fear is interfering with your child’s social activities, school performance, or sleep, you may want to see a qualified child therapist.

Which of my child’s fears are normal?
According to the Child Anxiety Network, the following fears are extremely common and considered normal:

0-2 years – Loud noises, strangers, separation from parents, large objects.
3-6 years – Imaginary things such as ghosts, monsters, the dark, sleeping alone, strange noises.
7-16 years – More realistic fears such as injury, illness, school performance, death, natural disasters.
Common types of phobias and fears

How to Deal With Exam Anxiety

How to Deal With Exam Anxiety

If you spend sleepless nights agonizing over exams, days or weeks before they take place, read on.


Find out what it is about exams that makes you anxious.
Is it being under-prepared, the possibility of failure, or the hype surrounding the major exams?.

Prepare well for the exam. Practice exam style questions and get them marked. Read over these if you are feeling particularly anxious or daily to remind yourself how well you're doing.

Ignore and avoid people that are making predictions or complaining of failing even before the test or exam takes place.

Review your notes the night before. This will leave information fresh in your memory, however if you feel this will add more pressure then don't. For some people this works, however for some cramming information simply makes it even more complicated.

Go to bed early and try using meditation or aromatherapy to calm down.

The day of the exam read over your practice questions. Breathe slowly and try to relax.

During the exam read the entire paper slowly. Don't panic. Highlight what you think you'll be able to answer. Before starting remember that you start every exam with 100%, not zero.

If the anxiety is persistent and severe, talk to your guidance counselor about it. He or she might be able to work with you to come up with strategies to overcome it.

He or she might also be able to speak to your teachers about it. If they know, they might be willing to give you more time to take the exam, if an anxiety attack happens to slow you down.

Exam has become suicide reason??

To most of us exams are worse than Chinese torture. Believe it or not there are people out there who can't wait to take an exam and prove themselves. If this is unbelievable, think of what you know you are good at and how you feel when you have a chance to demonstrate that skill.

For example, you know you can run faster than the wind and tomorrow is the school sports competition. Or you have a beautiful dress and tomorrow you get to wear it. Imagine the thrill and anticipation you will feel. For a lot of people, exams are like that. And you can feel that way too.

Here are the reasons we usually don't feel that way :

The number one reason we are scared of exams is because we know we are not prepared. If this is the case with you, unfortunately, there is no magic formula that can make exams tasty for you. Read the other articles in this section, and like top students, develop the habit of starting early. Decide on you about the your result from day one and visualize it everyday. You will be calm on exam day.

Many of us underestimate ourselves or our preparation. Most of us are better prepared than we think. Auto suggestions and affirmation scan help you feel more confident about yourself and your preparation. You can find some auto suggestions for students here.

Some of your friends may be on the verge of a nervous breakdown because of the coming exam. Others may be saying, "Oh I finished my preparation for this paper three months ago and I have reviewed everything 10 times!". Both can make you nervous. But don't let them. If you find you are being influenced by them, simply avoid them.

For some of us, even the possibility of not doing well in the exam is unthinkable. Subconsciously, we may be nurturing unreasonable beliefs such as 'If I don't do well in this exam I am a failure as a person', or ' If I don't do well in this exam my parents won't love me any more.' Thinking not doing well is absolutely unacceptable makes us exam phobic. If you think you have any such unreasonable belief deep down, you can change them by doing the negative thoughts meditation. Exams are important but they are not everything. So take it easy.

15 Things Not to Do at a Job Interview

When you’re interviewing for a job, there are a lot of things you should do to ensure interview

Employers are evaluating more than your words during the interview process. Your actions and non-verbal expressions tell a lot about your character, and if you aren't careful,they can send the wrong message to your interviewers. 


Review these tips to help you make sure that your actions measure up to your words during the interviewing experience. 

15 Things Not to Do at a Job Interview

1. Do not arrive late.  Prepare your travel carefully and leave a cushion for unexpected delays.  Arriving late can be a deal breaker and create the impression that you might be an irresponsible employee.

2. Don't arrive too early for your interview and force yourself to sit nervously in full view in a waiting area.  Plan to arrive no more than 10 minutes earlier than your interview appointment time. You can grab a cup of coffee nearby if you get there earlier than you expected.

3. Don't forget to smile.  All things being equal, most employers want pleasant co-workers.

4. Don't ignore the gatekeepers.  Even the lowliest receptionist or administrative worker may be asked his opinion about the impression you have made.  Engage everyone you meet, and make them feel very important.

5. Do not leave your cell phone on during the interview, or glance at it at all.  Most of us are semi-addicted to those messages and alerts coming into our phone, so knock out the temptation by silencing your cell.  If your phone is a distraction during the interview, employers may question how motivated you are about the job or if you will spend too much time on the phone if hired.

6. Do not lean back, slouch or display disinterest through your posture.  Lean slightly forward to engage your interviewer (s) and show an interest in what they are saying.

7. Don’t speak in a monotone.  Modulate your voice to show emphasis and excitement when making a point. Employers look for energetic and engaged employees. 

8. Do not look at your watch.  If you monitor the time in an obvious way, it might be perceived as an indication that you are bored, or in a hurry. 

9. Do not eat a snack bar or any food during a traditional interview.  This should go without saying, but stories from recruiters abound regarding candidates who have pulled some food out of their pocket. Same goes for gum or mints. Gum chewing can send an overly casual vibe and be distracting to the interviewer.

10. Don’t order something which is difficult to eat during an interview meal.  It is hard to maintain your dignity while slurping pasta.  Order a small portion which can be gracefully consumed. Avoid ordering alcoholic beverages during social segments of the interview process.  Alcohol can loosen your tongue in the wrong way.  In addition, it can send the wrong message about your seriousness of purpose. Here’s how to handle an interview at a restaurant.

11. Don't dress too casually. Err on the side of overdressing to demonstrate that you are serious about the opportunity. Review these tips for what to wear to an interview so you’re dressed appropriately.

12. Do not forget to listen carefully before answering.  Listening is an underrated interviewing skill.  Make sure you know what your interviewer is driving at before you launch into an answer.  Here are tips for listening and responding during an interview.

13. Don't act nervous or dejected if things aren't going perfectly.  Retaining your confidence when you are stumped by a question can demonstrate that you will work well under pressure.  Saying confidently that the question is a great one and that you will need to give it further thought to answer it fully is acceptable.  Review what to do if you can’t answer an interview question, so you don’t panic if it happens.

14. Don't reflect an angry tone in your voice if your interviewer has taken a combative stance.  Stress questions can be a test of how you will retain your composure under fire.  Maintain a civil tone at all times. 

15. Do not unintentionally play favorites during group interview situations.  There is a natural tendency for most of us to feel a stronger chemistry with one or more of our interviewers than the others. You might look at the comfortable person more often or address your answers or questions to her more frequently.  Make a deliberate effort to focus equally on each of your interviewers since it is likely that each of them will carry weight in the decision-making process.

success. There are also some things that you shouldn’t do if you want to get selected for a second interview or get a job offer.

How Distance Education Has Changed The Face Of Education In India

Education plays a very important role in the development of an individual. Quality education gives people the platform to learn and grow intellectually. However, face to face regular education is not made for everybody. For the under privileged section of society, housewives and working adults pursuing a regular degree is next to impossible. But this doesn’t mean that they should not have an opportunity to grow intellectually.

Distance education or the more popularly known form that is correspondence courses offer amazing opportunities to such people. Opportunities which otherwise would not have been possible.

Distance Education has improved in the last couple of years:

With development in technology the quality of distance education has improved drastically. Earlier distance education only involved the printed text material which was provided to student via post and other sources. Contact with qualified teachers was virtually next to impossible when the trend of distance education began. However, with the advent of internet, the face of distance education has changed completely.

Now students can have a classroom environment in the comfort of their homes via video conferencing and other services. For people who don’t have the opportunity or the time to pursue a regular course this form of learning has come as a blessing. Especially in the case of higher learning distance education has become very successful as well as helpful.

Distance Education also paves the road for foreign universities to set up in India:

After the coming of distance education, many established foreign universities have shown interest in setting up their branch in India.  This has opened the door for millions of students all over the country who do not have the privilege to study abroad. These universities are legitimate.

Distance education covers a vast gamut of courses. From small hobby courses to pursuing degree courses, distance education offers every opportunity possible. This is a wonderful opportunity for students all over the country who have the zeal to further their careers but do not have the time or the privilege to do so. Now with internet one can have knowledge from all over the world sitting anywhere and according to their time and convenience.

Distance Education very popular for students pursuing post graduation:

A degree in MBA has been one of the most popular courses which many students prefer to study via correspondence. Post graduate courses usually become the most popular correspondence courses. This is because by the time of graduation most students find a job which they want to continue along with their further education. As a result Distance Education has become one of the most sought for forms of learning for students who want to continue earning along with their learning.

Regular courses, especially the post graduation courses have very few seats in most universities. This is also one of the many reasons for Distance Education to flourish in India. As the market of students is huge but the opportunities are still very limited, correspondence education allows for more opportunities for kids all over the country. It is no longer looked down upon and many people have begun to seize this form of learning as an opportunity.